From the Rider-Waite deck

  

Kate’s card again – the card of fun and new things, good times and energetic enthusiasms.Since today was nothing like that, I suppose I should look at its reversed aspect. What would stop this Page from getting out there and having fun and what would the result be? 

What comes to my mind – probably because I spent the day with Peter (in the interests of the hideous ‘let’s still be friends’ scenario) – is a failure to get over the past and move on. 

And that’s how today did feel, not just about Peter but about Maryanne too. I missed her today. And about Anne. Of course it matters that she turns 18 on Sunday and I won’t see her. 

 In fact, really, Peter’s the least of it. He just happens to be here in the wrinkly old flesh. 

 This morning I cried – for Maryanne and Anne and, yes, John too, whose birthday is tomorrow. Why do the people I love always leave me? That’s what I cried. 

I don’t cry over it all the time. Mostly, I’m okay with it, but sometimes – like today – I feel it hard. Not a very Page of Wands day at all! 

Except that my Page of Wands is still with me, and that goes a long way to making it all alright.

Advertisements