Posts from the ‘4 The Emperor’ Category

The Emperor and Black Eyed Susan

Black Eyed Susan

From the Robin Wood Tarot

From the Robin Wood Tarot

Hope that one day – some undefined day yet to come – Jason would come over and have some kind of closer relationship with me, that was enough. Or so I thought.

And then he did the one thing I never dared to dream he’d do. The thing that, by its sheer impossibility, kept those tears coming over all this time.

He asked me to marry him.

Not only that, but it means everything to him that my heart tells me it should.

The man who has spent his life preferring to be alone, with no claim upon his heart, now talks easily of being my protector and provider. He speaks of my daughters without hesitation as an integral part of ‘our family.’

He took a long time to make the decision but, once made, is just as steadfast on his new path as he ever was on his old.

And all the while I know that he is giving up all that’s secure and familiar to make a life with me. A girl doesn’t get to feel this special too often in her life.

The Emperor sits on his throne, the symbol of masculine power and protection used in service to his people, but his kingdom is barren and empty without his lady.

I would have been wooed enough by his willingness to come to the other side of the world for me, but an Empress I’m to be and as an Empress I am wooed. He is coming next month to put a ring on my finger.

Was ever lady loved so well?

Black Eyed Susan is for inner peace, patience and slowing down, a timely reminder in a hectic week filled with such excitement. Naturally it led to the inevitable flare-up of my ankylosing spondylitis.

But by Saturday night I was sitting under the stars with a glass of wine and basking in a golden glow of pure happiness.

The Lord of my Heart is on his way and I have no more need to fear.

The Emperor and Black Eyed Susan

From the Robin Wood Tarot

From the Robin Wood Tarot

Black Eyed SusanIt’s been two weeks since my last entry, two hard exhausting weeks.

The chronicle of disasters and difficulties is astonishing, from trouble getting hold of boxes for the move to realising (too late!) that the shiny new fridge wasn’t designed to make it up a dogleg staircase to the kitchen.

Somehow, every problem was resolved by me shelling out a hundred bucks – which blew my moving budget very quickly.

I asked, I was given, but I had to work for it. That is how my life runs and recognising the pattern meant I could cope with every obstacle in a way that I have not managed before.

The Emperor is the masculine principle in its father aspect. He represents authority, discipline, intellect and protection – the protection of law, ethics and principles.

But I drew him in his reversed aspect, indicating the essential structure of these things is broken down or weakened, giving the key to his presence during this stressful move.

More than anything, I realised, the battles of the past fortnight have been fought and won by myself alone.

My weak moments saw me longing for a male presence (complete with car) to help with the move. My strong moments saw me celebrate the wonderful sensation of being completely self-reliant.

In other words, I carry with me, as do we all, both Emperor and Empress and at last they learned to work together.

The reversed Emperor of my inner petty dictator learned to trust his lady when she called for some nurturing resting time, while she deferred to him in the nitty gritty details of the move.

Black Eyed Susan is the slowing down and noticing the roses essence which helped to keep both aspects of my psyche in very good health during an extremely stressful time.

But I write this on my first relaxing Sunday morning in our beautiful new home. We made it, we did it. We are home.

4 The Emperor

From the Robin Wood deck

I might not want to think about stability and security right now, but obviously I’m supposed to!

So here he is, the male principle – disciplined, focused, the driving force, worldly wise.

Is he here today simply to tell me that I can take the woolly, touchy-feely girly thing too far?

Or do I need to work on my father issues?

One text I read pointed out that the astrological sign associated with the Emperor is Aries, the first sign in the Zodiac. That writer (whose details I don’t have, alas) suggested that this meant the qualities of the Emperor could be understood as being very similar to those of an infant – direct, energetic, focused, aggressive, but also tyrannical, impatient, demanding and controlling.

It seems to me that the challenge of the Emperor is to decide just what kind of boss you want to be (and, of course, what sort of boss you’re prepared to submit to). At this time in my life, I am well and truly the boss, and I think the Emperor is here today to remind me that the touchy-feely girly thing is all very well, but I have responsibilities which do require me to keep an eye on the basic structure of our lives as well.